A Woman and a Mother
For much of my life, I have struggled with a lot of insecurities. This has been paired, generally, with an ability to pretend I am confident. You know? And sometimes if you pretend something enough, it can kind of come to fruition. But for the most part, finding true comfort in my own skin has been a process. A process that is still underway, because these things are a lifelong journey. I really don’t believe that you can ever truly overcome or conquer insecurity– but you can control it. That’s what I think anyway.
Before I got pregnant, I was terrified of what it would do to my body. It was one of my main fears, which is completely absurd, but let us be honest or die. I was afraid that I wouldn’t feel pretty anymore once I was large with child. I was afraid that my body would be unrecognizable to me after our baby was born. I know. These worries are pathetic– so vain, so selfish. But it is what it is.
As it turned out, I loved being pregnant. I was lucky enough to have an easy go of it, and I felt so confident, so strong, and so beautiful in my skin for the duration of the nine months. And when Redmond was born those feelings mostly continued. Which came as a surprise to me. I never felt any disappointment in or dislike of my post-baby body. To me, the fact that I was no longer massively round bellied was a miracle in itself. Add to that the wonder of sustaining a life out of my boobs for goodness sake, and the miracle was greater still. I mean come on. What can men do? They can’t do ANYTHING compared to building and keeping life in a tiny human. Women are incredible.
But here’s the thing. Early motherhood is not glamorous. I spent months sort of bathed in breastmilk with sore nipples. My clothing inevitably would end up wet whenever I nursed Redmond because he was (is) a messy eater and would drool milk out of his mouth while he sucked. I tried to pull myself together, but when you’re a new mom, even when you’re pulled together you’re sort of frayed around the edges. Because underneath whatever pretty dress I might be wearing, I was rocking breast pads and some sort of less-than-sexy nursing bra. Because I’m sorry. Even the cute ones aren’t exactly alluring…
I’m finally able to wear regular bras again, now that Redmond only nurses a few times a day, and we have it down enough to basically be able to accomplish the task no matter what I have on. So when True&co contacted me and asked if I would like to feature some of their lingerie, I jumped at the chance. Like I literally squealed in delight and did a little hop for joy. I never ever spend money on under garments. I mean, unless its totally necessary. I’m not running around in my birthday suit. But I never indulge in the joy of pretty underthings. Because there’s a real joy there. It’s like buying new make up, or getting a manicure– a little splurge that makes you feel pampered and womanly–except in the case of a bra, its also supporting something that really needs supporting. At least in my case…So. Much. Milk. So. Much. Support. Needed.
True&co was a new company for me, but I loved my experience. You can take this sizing quiz so that you get the perfect bra fit, and their pieces are gorgeous. They also came beautifully packaged and they made my day.
My favorite one is definitely the black lace one pictured above. It clasps in the front, and the back will be perfect for tank tops and sleeveless dresses this summer. And if it does show, its so pretty that it’ll add to the look.
It’s easy to lose ourselves as women when we become mothers. Even though in so many ways, being a mother is such a womanly act. I spend lots of days in my gym clothes. I often wear a baseball cap because I don’t feel like doing my hair. I only wear make up two or three days out of the week. None of that really matters of course. My husband loves me in my own skin– he doesn’t care about fancy clothes or a made up face, or any of it. But it’s nice sometimes to give ourselves special treatment just for us. Life gets so busy, and I love caring for my son, working, keeping my home, making good food for my family– caring, in essence, for those around me. But as life speeds up and things get more stressful, I am reminded that I have to take time for myself to be at my best. As a wife. As a mother. As a woman. Slipping into something pretty and comfortable and going somewhere to refuel with friends does that for me. I come home rejuvenated, refreshed, and happy to resume my life.
How do you take care of yourself as a woman and a mother?
Denim shirt– Old Navy via Buffalo Exchange
Lace romper– Vintage (love this one)